Thursday, April 27, 2006

"Say, why does the Devil have all the good tunes?!"

AC links to Blender's 50 Worst Things to Happen to Music. Predictably enough, I too consider Number Seven a personal favourite:

FINDING GOD

Once the Big Guy gets under an artist's skin, the work tends to suffer. AL GREEN went from making the sexiest music known to man to making gospel albums known to nobody. MASE quit hip-hop for the ministry, and when he returned, his skills didn't come with him. The less said about BOB DYLAN's born-again albums the better, but the idea of Jehovah's Witness PRINCE proselytizing door-to-door in purple pumps still brings a smile. Esther, née MADONNA, caused quite the mishegas by hopping aboard Kabbalah's Judaism-meets-New-Age-hooey bandwagon. And CAT STEVENS loved Islam so much, he named himself after it when he converted and then quit the music biz in 1979.

Silly rock stars -- you're supposed to be the ones being slavishly worshipped!


Amen to that (heh heh). Amen also to the record-setting FOUR SLOTS devoted to Van Halen. And number one is a curiosity ... I only bought one issue of Blender -- the first, to get some idea of where it was headed. The reviews were pleasantly sassy, but the overall package was one big "meh: just more Maxim" -- i.e., kidstuff. So what, exactly, is Number One flagging?

3 comments:

F.C. Bearded said...

Funny - never used to be that way; whether composers, painters, or sculptors.

Whisky Prajer said...

Right you are. Makes me wonder who is responsible for the slip in quality control?

Scott said...

It's not God's fault -- just the standard problem of artists trying to push a moral through the song. You can get away with it if you're really talented, otherwise it's "Another Day in Paradise" (British comic asks, "Is there anything worse than Phil Collins singing about the homeless? 'Why are they homeless?' Because you've got all the bloody money, Phil!")

I remember that Prince and Madonna were interesting in they way they tried to reconcile their religious backgrounds with their, ahem, active lovelives. Once they got married, settled down and focused on their spirituality, I'm afraid the songs have suffered. Again, not because they're religious but because they're didactic and one-note. (No, Madonna, I will NOT wear a Kabbalah bracelet!)

As an old-time movie producer once said, "You want to send a message? Call Western Union!"