Thursday, May 05, 2011

Welcome To Grade 9, Track 5

“And The Cradle Will Rock,” Van Halen

Bearing no relation whatsoever to Orson Welles' notorious socialist play of the Dirty Thirties, this tune is about a hoser deadbeat, whom the spandex-clad David Lee Roth exhorts to, “Rock on.” Dumb, dumb song. But back in Grade 9 we fellas used to crack each other up by parroting his mock-stern question during the song's bridge: “Have you seen Junior's graaaaades?”

Yep. That's all it took to get a larf out of yer chums, back in 1980. But back then we used to find all sorts of inexplicable stuff funny. Dan Ackroyd “impersonating” Jimmy Carter; a play-doh castrati getting squished by “Mr. Hand,” etc., ad nauseum. Simpler times, for simpler minds.


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